Sorry, I’ve got rehearsal: or what I’ve gained from saying “I can’t”

“Sorry, I’ve got rehearsal.”

“Sorry, I’m building the set all weekend.”

“Sorry, I can’t. We’ve got improv that night.”

I spend a lot of time telling my friends and community, “I’m sorry, I can’t.” I don’t like it, but we all know that this is a part of theatre. Beyond my eight hours of teaching, I am also a director, designer, carpenter, coach, stitcher, stage manager, curriculum writer, master-electrician, blah, blah, blah. Oh yeah, and I’m a daughter, friend, wife-to-be, volunteer, activist, blah, blah, blah. I’m the type of person that wants to do everything, but my job requires me to limit a lot of what I do. I don’t like that part of my job, but instead of focusing on the negative, today I’m going to focus on all the things I GAIN because of the reasons I have to say “I can’t”

Kearney High Theatre Drama Club Fun Night 2015 Theatre Game Play


  • I gain time with students. Few teachers are as lucky as I am to spend quality time with their students. Not only do I spend roughly 20+ hours a week in rehearsal with my students, I spend roughly 15-20 hours on the weekend building sets with my kids. I get to know these kids really well. They share with me their dreams, fears, goals, and jokes. We talk about current events, art, the play we are working on…or sometimes just trade Alan Rickman impersonations. I’m so grateful for this time to learn about who my students are beyond the rehearsal hall and classroom. It helps me be a better teacher and director to them. I don’t take for granted that I spend more time with them than many of their parents do.
  • I gain new skills all the time. Each play is a new adventure. When I started teaching high school over twelve years ago, I didn’t know how to build much at all. So, I cracked a few books, watched a few videos, and learned how to build a staircase for a show that needed it. I also learned how to frame a door that year, but not well. I still struggle with doors, but I’m learning. With the help of a dear friend and the father of one of my students, we put a pool on stage one year. Sometimes we have to learn American Sign Language, or a traditional folk dance, or a new way to dye a fabric. There truly is never a dull moment.
Drama Club Fun Night in my Classroom Fall, 2015
  • I am constantly entertained. My students are really funny. I get to laugh constantly. I do my job because I love it. The kids are what make it so fun.
  • Everything is new again. Each year we put on four different shows. It’s always a new experience, with new content, with new students. It’s very hard to get bored.
Drama Club Fun Night: Project Runway (Students get grouped and given a theme, i.e. “The Potato Famine” and gave 20 minutes to raid the prop/costume storage areas to create a runway show.
  • I witness transformation. I see my students through personal and existential struggles. I get the honor to see the moment when the lightbulb “goes off” and they begin to think for themselves, have an artistic breakthrough, or finally realize what other people think, doesn’t matter.
  • I have hundreds of reasons to get up in the morning: When I was going through a tough time in my life over a decade ago, I realized that in a time of need, I need to be needed. When I had dozens reasons to not get out of bed, my students presented me with the hundred reasons why I need to be there. I had kids waiting at 7am at my door ready to have their morning chat. This time was sacred to them. It helped them get in the right mindset for their day and allowed them a moment with an adult that would hear them out. I’d like to think I did a lot for those kids, but honestly they saved my life. If not for them needing me to be there, I’m not sure what would have become of me.
  • I am a positive force in young people’s lives: This is the most important thing. I am very honored when my students trust me to help them through the challenges of their lives. I’ve been luckily enough to be chosen to be a listener, counselor, friend, parent, coach, teacher, and director. I’ve helped students find the right college, find the right friends, find the right activities, and find their path to happiness. I will never have to doubt that my life had worth.

Overall, I do this job because it gives me so much back. I wish I was completely altruistic, but sadly, I’m not. A lot of my identity is wrapped up into what I do for a living, probably because the amount of time I spend doing my job. If I’m not a good theatre teacher, then I feel like I’m not a good person. Happiness in my life really depends on happiness in my career. Being a theatre teacher allows me the great privilege to say, “I made a difference.” No weekend or weekday evening is worth giving up the chance to be important to someone else.

So…sorry, I can’t. I’m trying my best everyday to be a positive force for change in young people’s lives. You should join me. I promise you’ll be entertained!



The Lonely Life of a Theatre Teacher

People often fall in love with theatre due to its collaborative nature; I know I did. I learned at a young age that I was happiest when I was surrounded by others who were brighter and more creative than myself. Throughout high school, I hung out with kids who were talented and brilliant and I delighted in their intellectual glow. I thrive most when I am challenged and inspired by other people.  Theatre people are all about creating magic with a few good artists in the room together. All that said, it’s strange how isolating it is to be a high school theatre teacher in America.

Kearney High’s Winter Play Rumors 2015. Set Design by Scenographics, constructed by Shannon Cameron. Hair, Make-Up, Costumes and Lights designed by Shannon Cameron

Here in Nebraska, it’s rare when a high school has a dedicated theatre teacher who doesn’t also teach another subject as well. Some small schools offer only a one-act, which a music teacher or counselor will supervise as an “extra duty” assignment. Even more rare, is to have another theatre teacher, or the holy grail: a Technical Director.  In most Nebraska schools, this role is far more broadly defined than it is in professional theatre. In addition to the duties traditionally associated with a TD, Nebraska high school Technical Directors also serve as designer, manager, contract writer, carpenter, master-electrician, etc. This past year I’ve been fighting hard for us to hire a full-time Technical Director here at Kearney High. We are getting a new Performing Arts Center next fall thanks to the generous taxpayers of Kearney. It’s going to be an amazing space and my students will be proud to perform there. However, in order to keep this new space in good condition, properly maintained, and safe for everyone who uses it, we really need someone who will supervise it directly. As a performing arts center, theatre is not the only activity that will make use of this space. Several high/middle school/elementary bands, orchestras, and choirs will use it as their main performance venue. Furthermore, the community and the rest of the district uses it for meetings, performances, recitals, etc. It’s a lot to keep track of and change-overs are a ton of work. We really need someone with the technical expertise to tackle this job.


Selfishly, I want a true collaborator and a second teacher to my students. I am a trained director who must also design, build, and focus every set, costume, and light. I am certainly no expert on the technical aspects of theatre, but after a number of years of trial and error, I’m proud to say that I know my way around most power tools and ellipsoidals. However, I would far prefer to have a knowledgeable designer as a  partner in the creation of technical elements, because they are an expert on these things. As I begin pre-production work on our spring musical, Children of Eden, my mind is swimming with director ideas; symbols, color schemes, historical paintings, found objects, themes, and research, and I could really use an artistic team to work through these ideas. But instead, it’s just me out there, floating with my thoughts. And you know what? This show is going to be good. I have a lot of good ideas. But, the show could be great. My ideas could be far better with the help of some inspired designers to work with. Together we could find the best way to tell the story.

The Crucible by Arthur Miller produced by Kearney High Theatre. Set/Lighting Design by Shannon Cameron, costume rented from Norcostco

Luckily, I have my students and they are fantastic. I challenge them to solve problems of the script along with me, which is a great learning opportunity for them. I am also grateful to have a few professional designers in town to call upon. However it is very difficult to fit them in my budget, and they absolutely need to be paid. I try to reach out to one for each show. I rented costumes for the 37 actors in The Crucible this fall, I hired a lighting designer for Cinderella last year, and I will continue to do that as we can raise funds to make it happen. 

Kearney High Theatre’s production of Rumors, Spring 2015

Teachers of theatre are so often department-less. They get lumped into the English department, but we are not the same. Luckily, I have hundreds of very entertaining students that make the hours spent a bit less lonely. Theatre is a collaborative art, after all. Cross your fingers we get that Technical Director next fall!